That Time I Was Humiliated

To set the scene, it was 1992, I was fourteen years old and absolutely in love with my first boyfriend. His name was Rick and he wore a trench coat and combat boots and looked like the kid in Terminator 2. Had the same hair and everything. I was obsessed. He would walk me home from school every day and before I would go inside, we would kiss goodbye on the front porch.  

My dad was in the military and his work supported us financially. The community was pretty small and basically everyone knew each other. My mom worked super part time so she was there when we got home from school. She was the one who shuffled us here and there to appointments. My sister was about eleven and very curious about basically everything.  

One day after school, my sister asked my mom “what is aural secks*?” Who in the world knows where she heard it. School probably. My mom naturally avoided answering the question directly and said “oh honey, it’s just another way of saying kissing.”  

Skip ahead about two or three weeks.  My mom, sister and I are sitting in the waiting room of the doctor’s office for our regular check ups. My mom asks me “do you ever kiss your boyfriend?” Of course, I lie, and immediately deny any kissing is going on.   

Then, as loudly as an eleven year old can possibly speak, my sister exclaims:  

“That’s not true!  You have aural secks* on the front porch all the time!”

I. Absolutely. Died.  

There are not even words to describe how mortified I was. Of course the entire waiting room whipped around and looked at us. I insisted that was NOT having aural secks, on the porch or anywhere else!! My mom finally connected the dots and figured out what happened but dang it was a pretty horrifying five minutes.

All of this is to say… there won’t be any surprises on the day of your boudoir shoot. I’ll clearly communicate everything you need to know. I’ll send you a step-by-step prep guide to help you in the weeks leading up to your shoot. I’ll provide info on where to shop for wardrobe, ideas on hair, makeup and false lashes, skin prep, and more. The day of your shoot, I’ll guide you through every single minute.  

I’ll lay out your outfits in the order we are going to photograph you in them. I’ll pose you head to toe during your shoot. I’ll give you expert tips on how to get that sassy face. You would never guess my best tip. I’ll have you giggling in no time.

I will not, at any point, under any circumstances, accuse you of having aural secks on your front porch.  

Want to know more about a shoot? Set up a consultation with me! There is no obligation to book and you just might find that you are comfortable enough to finally take the leap.  

*if you are wondering why I used “aural secks,” I am trying to avoid this post being classified as something that rhymes with jam.